I’m not gonna lie, it’s a scary time. It seems like every day brings a new disaster; political, environmental, interpersonal (and some days brings all of them all at once). I know people who are struggling to pay their bills, others who are trying to get their families to safer states, and others who are contemplating (or actively working to) flee the country entirely. It can feel difficult in these times to know what to do. Or to even know how to know what to do. 

And with our constant news cycles, and our access to social media, it’s easy to be consistently in a state of dysregulation. To feel overwhelmed and anxious and afraid. Honestly, with everything that’s going on it can feel natural to feel that way. 

I’ve definitely had my share of days where the spiral was too much. Where it was hard to get out of bed. Hard to put down the news. Hard to stop constantly refreshing. There have been some weeks where there were more bad days than good. So if you’re there, I see you. 

I wanted to share some things that have helped me when I find myself getting sucked into those spirals. Hopefully something here will be useful to you as well:

1: Limit the intake of news. Our bodies and brains were never designed to be taking in all of the world’s trauma at one time. I’ve found it helpful to limit the amount of news I’m taking in. Meaning instead of checking the news every ten minutes, I check once or twice a day. The benefit of that is instead of simply seeing alert after alert of “breaking news” with no details, I see stories that are more fleshed out. Also, since lots of people are hyper connected if something truly newsworthy that I absolutely need to know about happens I trust I will find out about it. 

2: Limit the scope of news. I pay more attention to local news than I do to national news than I do to international news. Again, I’m not ignoring things, I just know I can have the biggest impact locally so I pay more attention to that. 

3: Find a subject matter expert. It’s easy to get swayed by people in your circle or people online. There have been several times when some kind of trans something has been in the news and people online were panicking and I started to feel super afraid and then I turned to a subject matter expert who provided much needed context and correctives and I realized I didn’t need to panic. So search out people who can help you be better informed and provide much needed context. 

4: Find an issue and get involved. I can’t do everything but I can do something. And when I do something about one thing I find that I am more able to do something about other things. Getting tangibly involved has been so good for me. I’ve also found that getting involved means I am rubbing shoulders and working alongside people who think and believe very differently from me and yet because we’re working together on something we both care about we’re able to find some common ground. This helps me to get out of modes of being suspicious of everyone around me (especially as someone living in rural America) and more open to finding points of connection. 

5: Be in some kind of in person community. Doesn’t have to be formal. You don’t have to join a church or a club. Just do trivia with friends once a week. Go to Sunday brunch. Have some people over for dinner. Go for a walk with a friend. Simple, in person community matters. 

6: Work to keep my heart soft and open. It’s easy to get jaded. It’s easy to see people as your enemy. It’s easy to feel like no one cares as much as you. Or that no one cares about the things you care about. I’ve been working really hard to keep my heart soft (even as I know that will make me vulnerable). I want to remain open to love, to connection, to transformation of myself and others. 

These are the things that have been making the biggest difference in my life lately. I hope something in there is useful to you and can help you to feel more regulated and safe.